Keeping Up with Kingston...

It can be quite a daunting experience living and working in Kingston & St Andrew. It’s even more overwhelming keeping up with the who’s who of its diminishing middle class. You need to be well connected, fashionable, sociable, and importantly beautiful and have the ‘right’ colour or at least friends who do. It requires lots of money (or friends with the dough), time, and, of course, a whole lot of posturing.

Honestly, it’s really not that difficult to maintain your relevance and be cool in Kingston. You just have to put yourself out there and try. Here are a few tips.

• If 100 Hope Road isn’t your new spot, then something is clearly wrong with you.
• Get on the guest lists for movie premiers. You’re ahead of the game if you were at Spectre. The Star Warz premier doesn’t count… too many people below the clock there.
• Birthday parties are in. Let Fiction, Ribbiz, Cru, Spade and other hip spots around town invite John public to come and celebrate with you and your friends. However, the fancier and more exclusive you make it, the cooler you are.
• The Fashionistas are still dominant but your currency hinges on you being at Collection Moda and Caribbean Fashion Week (in the front row of course!).
• Cameras are the new party essentials. Make sure the photographers from Sleek, Infuzion, Lehwego and Stush seek you out. The rest don’t matter really.
• Deep quote your pictures! There’s no better confirmation that you are of the elite intelligentsia.
• Buy Jamaican… well designs really.

Finally, if you can get into Regency on a Friday night, you clearly are elite. Be confident in your posturing. Think important, act important. The key is always to showcase what you are so people can be inspired by you and have something to aspire to be.  

Easy right? 

P.S. Please don't take me (too?) seriously